“Why do I like pressure on my body?”
If you like pressure on your body — heavy blankets, tight hugs, snug clothes — your nervous system is using a regulation strategy it figured out on its own.
special interests
Special interests are deeply focused areas of engagement that autistic people experience with a level of emotional investment, sustained attention, and joy that goes well beyond typical hobbies. Clinically categorised under restricted repetitive behaviours, special interests are one of the defining characteristics of autism — and for most autistic adults, they are a primary source of motivation, regulation, identity, and connection. Between 75% and 95% of autistic people have at least one special interest, and 82% have more than one.
synaptic pruning
Synaptic pruning is the process by which the brain refines its connections during development, removing synapses that are used less frequently while strengthening active ones. In autistic brains, this process works differently — two independent cleanup systems (the neuron's internal recycling programme and the brain's specialised immune cells) are both less aggressive, meaning significantly more connections are retained. This denser wiring contributes to many recognisable autistic experiences: sensory intensity, deep focus, rich pattern recognition, difficulty filtering, and the challenge of switching between tasks or environments.
the mTOR pathway
The mTOR pathway is a signalling system inside every cell that regulates the balance between building new structures and recycling old ones. In autistic brains, this pathway runs hotter than typical, suppressing the cell's internal cleanup processes. Up to 58% of autism-associated genes relate to this pathway, making it a point of convergence where many different genetic routes produce similar outcomes — from differences in synaptic pruning and sensory processing to neuroinflammation and the balance between excitatory and inhibitory brain signalling.
“Why do I do better with a routine?”
Because routine is architecture you can rely on when everything else is wobbly or up in the air.
When you do the same things in the same order, your brain doesn't have to build the day from scratch. The route is known, the sequence is mapped, all the decisions have already been made, and you are good to go. This frees up precious cognitive resources for the things that actually need your attention.
“Why do I watch the same show over and over?”
Because your nervous system is doing something smart, so good for you! :)
When you rewatch a familiar show, your brain isn't processing anything new — no plot twists to manage, no unfamiliar characters to track, no sudden shifts in tone to adjust to.
intolerance of uncertainty
Intolerance of uncertainty (IU) describes the degree to which a nervous system needs predictability in order to function — not as a preference, but as a genuine operational requirement. When outcomes are unknown or plans unconfirmed, a high-IU nervous system tends to generate contingencies: running through variables, gathering information in advance, and finding it difficult to settle until enough is known. For many autistic and ADHD adults, IU runs at a higher baseline than in the general population, and shows up in everyday experiences like needing to know the plan before you can be present, finding plan changes disproportionately disruptive, or preparing carefully for situations in order to free up bandwidth to actually enjoy them. It's not about rigidity or control — it's a nervous system requesting the information it needs to work properly.
restricted repetitive behaviours (RRBs)
Restricted Repetitive Behaviours (RRBs) is the clinical term for a broad group of autistic traits including stimming, echolalia, routines, persistent interests, and sensory sensitivities. Despite the pathologising name, these patterns serve real purposes — self-regulation, cognitive energy conservation, and genuine enjoyment. They are how an autistic nervous system manages a world that doesn't come with enough predictability built in.
Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD)
Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) is an intense emotional and physical response to perceived rejection, criticism, or the fear of falling short — experienced by many neurodivergent people. The hot flash of shame, the spiral of "what did I do wrong," the doomsday scenarios building while the other person is simply answering their front door — these are recognisable experiences for many people who grew up having their authentic selves ignored, dismissed, or misunderstood. RSD is a pattern recognition system shaped by real history, and having language for it means you can begin to watch the reaction rather than be yanked along by it.
“Is fidgeting and stimming the same thing?”
Fidgeting is similar to stimming, but they serve different purposes. While stimming tends to function as emotional regulation (a way to manage overwhelming feelings or sensory input), fidgeting more often serves focus regulation and energy discharge. The movements might look the same from the outside, but the internal experience and function can be quite different.
fidgeting
Fidgeting involves small, often unconscious movements—bouncing your leg, tapping your fingers, clicking a pen, doodling, twirling your hair. These movements help regulate focus and discharge energy, particularly for people with ADHD. Fidgeting provides the sensory input your brain needs to stay alert and engaged, especially during tasks that don't provide enough stimulation on their own. It's about maintaining the right level of arousal (alertness) to concentrate or releasing restless energy when big movements aren't possible.
“Why do people fidget when they are hyperactive?”
Fidgeting serves as an involuntary mechanism for self-regulating attention and enhancing alertness, especially during tasks perceived as cognitively demanding (hard to do) or monotonous (i.e. boring and repetitive).
“Is ADHD just about not being able to pay attention?”
Attention is only one possible component of ADHD. We now also understand attention to be variable in ADHD, with a difficulty for the brain to self-regulate attention.
“I have tried traditional “self-care” activities, and they don’t do anything for me. What am I doing wrong?”
Nothing! Neurodivergent brains need more time to process, decompress, and recharge.
How can I recognize when I’m about to make an impulsive decision?
Impulsive decisions can make us feel powerless. Even if we ignore the possible negative consequences of the decisions, simply feeling that we did something we couldn’t notice “in time” or catch while it was happening can be very vulnerable and disempowering. After the fact, it sometimes feels obvious – ‘duh, this was silly; I made …
impulsivity
Impulsivity in ADHD is characterized by a shortened pause between impulse and action: a bright flash that leads immediately to behaviour before you can fully consider it. Impulsivity shows up in different forms: verbal (blurting out, interrupting), emotional (expressing strong feelings immediately), decision-making (choosing immediate rewards over delayed ones), and motor (acting on physical urges).
auditory stimming
Auditory stimming is a form of self-stimulatory behaviour that involves making sounds with your voice, whether through non-word vocalisations (vocal stimming) or speech-based expressions (verbal stimming). This natural and beneficial form of self-expression helps with emotional regulation, sensory processing, and achieving a sense of comfort and focus.
decompressing
Decompressing refers to engaging in activities or behaviours that allow a person to relax, unwind, and alleviate stress or sensory overload.
This term is particularly significant in the neurodivergent community as we often experience heightened sensitivity to environmental stimuli, leading to increased stress and anxiety levels.
Making sure to have time to decompress after especially taxing events is an essential part of self-care.
deep pressure
Deep pressure is a natural sensory need where firm, consistent pressure (like heavy blankets or tight hugs) helps tension melt away from your body. Many people naturally seek this through things like snug clothing or curling up under blankets - it's your nervous system's way of finding calm and comfort.
emotional dysregulation
Emotional dysregulation is the inability to regulate the intensity and quality of emotions in order to generate an appropriate emotional response and return to an emotional baseline.
When someone has difficulty regulating their emotions, they are easily overstimulated and they can get upset or overwhelmed easily. On the other hand, they can also have trouble with calming down, relaxing, or decompressing and it takes much effort to regulate their mood.
From the outside, it might look like overreacting. From the inside, it feels like your nervous system is overwhelmed by emotional information your brain is struggling to process and modulate.
sensory avoiding
Sensory avoiding, also known as sensory under-responsivity, refers to a pattern of behaviour where individuals actively try to avoid or minimise exposure to sensory stimuli. These individuals may have a heightened sensitivity to sensory input and may find certain sensations overwhelming or discomforting. As a result, they may engage in behaviours such as avoiding crowded …
sensory seeking
Sensory-seeking refers to a behavioural pattern or tendency in neurodivergent folks where they actively seek out and engage in sensory experiences or stimuli. People may have a heightened desire for sensory input and actively seek activities or environments that provide intense or stimulating sensations.
stimming
Stimming (self-stimulatory behaviour) tends to be more intense, deliberate, and repetitive. It can include hand flapping, rocking, making repetitive sounds, spinning, examining textures intensely, or listening to the same song on repeat for hours. Stimming is historically associated with autism and serves primarily as emotional and sensory regulation—a way to manage overwhelming feelings, process sensory input, express joy or excitement, or meet a physiological need for specific sensory feedback. Autistic people often describe stimming as a need rather than a choice.