stress Archives

“What’s the difference between verbal shutdown, selective mutism, and being non-speaking?”

Verbal shutdown, selective mutism and being non-speaking are all experiences that involve not speaking, but they work differently, feel different from the inside, and have different causes.

Verbal shutdown: temporary loss of speech due to overwhelm

Being non-speaking: permanent loss of speech, but not loss of communication

Apraxia: loss of speech due to motor planning difficulties in the brain that provide the movements required to form words

Selective/situational mutism: an anxiety disorder that results in loss of speech consistently in specific contexts

intolerance of uncertainty

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Intolerance of uncertainty (IU) describes the degree to which a nervous system needs predictability in order to function — not as a preference, but as a genuine operational requirement. When outcomes are unknown or plans unconfirmed, a high-IU nervous system tends to generate contingencies: running through variables, gathering information in advance, and finding it difficult to settle until enough is known. For many autistic and ADHD adults, IU runs at a higher baseline than in the general population, and shows up in everyday experiences like needing to know the plan before you can be present, finding plan changes disproportionately disruptive, or preparing carefully for situations in order to free up bandwidth to actually enjoy them. It's not about rigidity or control — it's a nervous system requesting the information it needs to work properly.

restricted repetitive behaviours (RRBs)

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Restricted Repetitive Behaviours (RRBs) is the clinical term for a broad group of autistic traits including stimming, echolalia, routines, persistent interests, and sensory sensitivities. Despite the pathologising name, these patterns serve real purposes — self-regulation, cognitive energy conservation, and genuine enjoyment. They are how an autistic nervous system manages a world that doesn't come with enough predictability built in.

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD)

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Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) is an intense emotional and physical response to perceived rejection, criticism, or the fear of falling short — experienced by many neurodivergent people. The hot flash of shame, the spiral of "what did I do wrong," the doomsday scenarios building while the other person is simply answering their front door — these are recognisable experiences for many people who grew up having their authentic selves ignored, dismissed, or misunderstood. RSD is a pattern recognition system shaped by real history, and having language for it means you can begin to watch the reaction rather than be yanked along by it.

“What’s actually happening when I go into verbal shutdown?”

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A verbal shutdown might appear to be “nothing” from the outside, but actually, a lot is going on beneath the surface. Language, speech, even just on the technical side, are very complicated, even before you start adding the social layers on top of it (word choices, cadence, implications of tone of voice, non-verbal communication aspects). …

transitions

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Transitioning, in the context of neurodiversity, refers to the process of moving from one state, activity, or place to another. It involves a shift in attention, focus, and cognitive resources.

For neurodivergent individuals, it may require additional time, support, and strategies to manage effectively.

Transitioning can encompass a wide range of changes, from minor daily shifts like moving from one task to another, to major life changes such as transitioning from school to work or from living at home to independent living.

ADHD paralysis

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ADHD paralysis is a form of executive dysfunction.

It refers to the difficulty in initiating, continuing, or completing tasks, even when the person understands the urgency and importance, and also has the ability to do the task. ADHD paralysis can be triggered by various factors, including overwhelm, anxiety, or the perceived complexity of a task.

demand avoidance

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Demand avoidance means appearing opposed to doing something when it's perceived as a demand, especially from an authority figure - even if you actually want to do the thing. While it may look like defiance or stubbornness to others, it's actually an involuntary self-preservation response triggered by threats to autonomy. This response happens automatically, not as a conscious decision to be difficult.

norepinephrine

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Norepinephrine (also called noradrenaline) is a neurotransmitter produced by the locus coeruleus in the brainstem. It regulates alertness, attention, arousal, and the stress response, and works alongside dopamine in the prefrontal cortex to support executive function. Your prefrontal cortex needs norepinephrine in an optimal range — too little, and you can't sustain focus, too much, and the brain shifts to reactive, survival-oriented processing.

In ADHD, norepinephrine signalling is dysregulated, contributing to difficulties with sustained attention, emotional regulation, and the stress response.

emotional dysregulation

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Emotional dysregulation is the inability to regulate the intensity and quality of emotions in order to generate an appropriate emotional response and return to an emotional baseline.

When someone has difficulty regulating their emotions, they are easily overstimulated and they can get upset or overwhelmed easily. On the other hand, they can also have trouble with calming down, relaxing, or decompressing and it takes much effort to regulate their mood.

From the outside, it might look like overreacting. From the inside, it feels like your nervous system is overwhelmed by emotional information your brain is struggling to process and modulate.

rumination

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Ruminations are thought loops that you seemingly can’t get out of. Examples: thinking about what you should’ve said 5 years ago, feeling anxious if they misunderstood you, or worrying about whether you should’ve behaved differently, did they judge you, whether you were in the wrong, etc. Can be present in both OCD or ADHD. Rumination …