|| First published: | Last edited: || 📚🕒 Reading Time: 3 minutes Object constancy is the notion that you remain connected and aware of items or people even when they are not visible or physically around.
Difficulties in object constancy lead to the “out of sight, out of mind” experience, which is very common with ADHD folk. This is not to be confused with object permanence, which is a developmental stage in babies, and relates to them believing things genuinely stop existing when not in sight.
Object constancy vs object permanence
What is object permanence?
Object permanence was a term coined for observing the psychology of small children, and developing the skill of object permanence meant that the child finally learned that things even exist when they can’t see them. As it says in the name: the objects are permanent. When a baby does not have object permanence, they genuinely think stuff stops existing when they disappear – this is partly why peekaboo is so exciting and somewhat scary for babies. Stopped existing – existing again! Yay!
Object permanence and ADHD
The phenomenon of “out of sight, out of mind” is very familiar to many ADHD folks.
The object’s visibility reminds us of the task, so many of us keep little piles of STUFF around to help us through the day. For example, you leave your water bottle next to the sink to remind yourself to fill it up and take it with you.
Or, you keep your important meds next to your water bottle instead of the cupboard so you take them. (And someone putting them away to “tidy up” might as well just throw them away, because it might mean you don’t take the meds next time you’d need to.)
Object permanence is often casually used to describe this phenomenon when it came to ADHD, but it’s not accurate. The struggle is not about actually believing our meds stopped existing when they were put away, we just forget they exist. Luckily, there is a term that is suited to this, and it’s object constancy.
Object constancy and relationships
Object constancy originally refers to human connections (which is somewhat confusing as humans are not objects 🙂 ).
Having object constancy when it comes to people means that you can maintain an emotional connection to them even when they are not physically around.
Having difficulties with object constancy might mean a severed connection or a sense of distance or isolation when apart. You might be able to relate to this if you’ve also experienced embarrassment or shame when you forgot to check in with friends who moved away or changed school, workplace, etc. (And when you’re both neurodivergent, you both forget, but when you do catch up, it’s as if no time has passed.)
Object constancy and objects
This is the “out of sight, out of mind” experience, and it’s most probably related to working memory.
- Leaving wet laundry in the washing machine because you’re not in the room where the machine is, not seeing and not remembering the task.
- Remembering vividly that you need to buy Tabasco sauce because you ran out, buying one and when you put it in the pantry, you realise you’ve already bought three — the important thing you remembered was running out, but not that you’ve already replaced it. Three times.
- It can also manifest in putting important objects to very secure places you will surely remember to check for when you need them, and then, obviously, forgetting where that very secure place was. (Anyone having a designated passport place, uses it regularly and still struggle with passports legging it? Must be the Borrowers.)
Differences in object constancy can also lead to accidental or necessary spending to replace misplaced or “I forgot I already replaced this” items. For more on the extra expenses when it comes to dealing with ADHD, see ADHD tax
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