“Don’t people grow out of ADHD?”
People don't grow out of ADHD. Symptoms change from external hyperactivity to internal restlessness, and life transitions often unmask previously hidden ADHD.
“Doesn’t ADHD mostly affect boys?”
Girls with ADHD are real and underdiagnosed. Population studies show similar rates to boys, but referral bias and different presentations keep girls invisible. ADHD doesn't discriminate by gender, but diagnostic bias does—people socialized as girls face 4+ year delays in diagnosis.
“Does ADHD mean you’re always hyperactive?”
One aspect of ADHD is difficulties in the brain's impulse self-regulation systems, which in childhood can manifest as movement that's deemed excessive, but this is neither required for ADHD nor the whole story of what hyperactivity means.
“Is ADHD caused by trauma?”
While ADHD correlates with a higher number of adverse childhood experiences, hundreds of studies show that traumatic experiences are not a causative factor - if anything, it’s the other way around.
“Will I still be myself after an ADHD / Autism diagnosis?”
You won't lose yourself - in fact, most people find the opposite happens. As you gain clarity and self-compassion, drop the shame around your struggles, and learn to unmask more, you might discover you're more yourself than ever before. You'll finally get to meet the version of yourself that isn't constantly performing, compensating, or apologising for existing.
“I don’t want to become my label and use my neurodivergence as an excuse”
If you're worried about this, you're already not that person. Asking for accommodations (like quiet spaces, reminders, breaks) is self-care and self-advocacy. The difference between advocating for your needs and being manipulative comes down to respect: are you communicating your limits while taking responsibility, or are you demanding others tolerate harmful behaviour?
“Why get an ADHD / autism diagnosis just to get a label?”
Whether you like it or not, you already have labels — lazy, scatterbrain, weird, messy — given to you by others. You have probably internalised many of them over the decades, too. The difference with a diagnosis is that this label is one you choose for yourself based on understanding, and not a mean, untrue one imposed on you out of frustration or judgment.
“What can a neurodivergent diagnosis give me if I got this far on my own?”
You’ve developed coping strategies and made it work so far. Hooray! But what’s working today might not work tomorrow — especially when life throws big changes at you like hormonal shifts, job changes, or major life transitions. A diagnosis can give you a baseline understanding of your brain so you can adapt when things change, rather than having to reverse-engineer everything from scratch during a crisis.
“I’m afraid of a diagnosis, I don’t want to be fixed!”
Good news: a neurodivergent diagnosis isn't about fixing you, because you're not broken. What it actually does is give you a framework to understand how your brain works and what you need - so you can finally stop forcing neurotypical solutions on yourself.
diagnostic criteria
Diagnostic criteria are prerequisites for a diagnosis: in the case of neurodivergence, they are the presentations and traits an assessor is looking for when diagnosing a person with a neurodivergent condition.
AuDHD
AuDHD is an unofficial term for co-occurring Autism and ADHD - it is used when someone has both conditions.
co-occurring conditions
Co-occurrence means that certain neurodivergent traits and conditions naturally tend to appear together. When you're neurodivergent in one way, you're more likely to experience other forms of neurodivergence too - research shows this happens in up to 70% of cases. These patterns extend beyond just neurodevelopmental differences to include physical health and mental health experiences. Understanding co-occurrence is vital because it helps explain how different aspects of neurodivergence connect, leading to better self-understanding and more effective support. While traditional healthcare often treats conditions separately, recognizing these natural connections can transform how you advocate for your needs and access appropriate care.
titration
Titration is when together with your medical professional you trial different types of medications and the doctor then adjusts the dose based on your experience.